Hi, Steve! I'm sorry I missed your other post on this, but I think what is not working for me is the panorama. I like the second one better, but the ice effectively divides the scene in the middle. If there was more of the scene at the bottom showing what is happening under the ice, it would help.Unless there's a specific reason it's this size that I failed to read, of course, then I like the first one. What I would change with it is instead of the hash marks, just make the ice "transparent" in a gradient toward the foreground. That way we can see the scene with the merman and the fish without losing the concept that they're under the ice.The more I think about it, I like this idea better than the other one.
Love the idea Steve, I'll incorporate it.My thoughts about the underwater scene is lots of varying water lines with color, some plant life, and bubbles. I never draw them first tho...it happens when I paint. I like the idea of some transition from the ice to the water...I'll do that with color. :)Oh man you guys, thanks for all of the awesome help!!! I SO wanted to post something on scbwi mentioning how if they want more to post then they need to give more feedback. Huh, I guess that's why I started this group. ;)Going to the drawing board, yay!
Oh btw, the reason its in this format is because I don't have any page spreads in my portfolio that are recent. I have two but my skills have developed since then and wanted the challenge.
LOL I was confused about something, but now it makes perfect sense. Sorry, Sarah. I meant that for you. I need some coffee!
I am wondering if the ice isn't too opaque. I think the straight on perspective may be hampering the story a little bit as well.(And this is just me being a technical boob, but if the water is cold enough to freeze for skating the fish would be hibernating in the mud on the bottom of the lake.)I love your whimsical style and thing if you really want to push the envelope you could get an amazing spread.I'd change the fish to warm blooded creatures, maybe otters. They have such expressive faces, you'd have more interaction going on.I'd change the perspective slightly so that we are looking down on the scene instead. This would do two things, 1. it would get rid of the line dividing your scene (the ice) and 2. it would better connect the real girl with the magical mermaid. Granted you'd lose some of the face of the upper child but I think it would be much more intense an image that way.Or you can go all out crazy and come from the perspective of being UNDER the ice. As if you are another underwater creature. Hee.
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