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Fire is generally much safer when contained.
I was a bit concerned about the perspective of the table and things in the foreground, as that is not my strong suit. Also attempting candle flame in graphite was a challenge!
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Illustration Friday: Contained (UPDATED 1/19/09)
Okay, I have the changed version of this to show you! I took many of the suggestions, thank you so much. I think it really turned out so much better because of you!
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Fire is generally much safer when contained.
I was a bit concerned about the perspective of the table and things in the foreground, as that is not my strong suit. Also attempting candle flame in graphite was a challenge!
***********
Fire is generally much safer when contained.
I was a bit concerned about the perspective of the table and things in the foreground, as that is not my strong suit. Also attempting candle flame in graphite was a challenge!
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6 comments:
Hi ya,
I love the whole idea here...at kid at a picnic table watching moths to the flame. That would have been me! :) I love his head and expression. It is really well done and I love all the details here..like the fireflies and the light on the table cloth. The flame is well done. The only thing is the lamp seem slightly askew---top compared to the bottom and slightly too close to the edge of the table. I had to really search for that, so it could just be my imagination! :)
Otherwise, it looks perfect to me.
Christy
I love the lights and darks here. And the boy's face is perfect, great expression and proportion. The only thing is his posture is slightly off. With the weight of the head tilted on his right side, his right shoulder should tilt down a little more if he's relaxed. Other than that, this is really awesome. And did I say his face is perfect? Because to me it is :-)
Beautiful Carmen! I am so enjoying your graphite work, and it's getting stronger by the piece. I agree with the others, the expression is fantastic and zoned in on what's going on. I'm with Christy here, we went camping all the time when I was little and this would be me. As for his posture...I would have been sitting like that. More excited than relaxed, but it's great that the piece is left open to the viewer.
I agree about the lantern. But other than that, it's BEAUTIFUL! :D
very nice piece! I like the hanging clothes - poor kid has to do his own laundry! Great rendering - the softness of everything is quite nice.
I did have a couple of things (which is weird, I guess, because I assume it's a finished piece...so should we be saying anything? but then that's why you'd post on here...anyhow - this parenthasis was for me, so you should just skip to the part after this parenthasis) - I'd like to see some or one of the clothes in the back be overlapped by the kids head...because with no overlapping and no groundline or shadows for the clothes, it's hard to really see where they are in the space. A little overlapping would solve that.
I'd also second the posture - but I'd add that the face looks like bliss/peaceful looking at the flame - I wonder what it would look like with the expression pushed a little more. Something more towards excitement or amazement or fascination...
Anyhow - those are quite small things - it's a terrific piece that really could be left as is. And terrific for IF!
Great work Carmen! You have really good control of graphite, and everything looks very balanced!
Here's my super-duper picky critiques...
1. I see a hard line on the tablecloth, separating the boy from the table. It's great, but it softens as soon as it hits the wood tale.
2. I could imagine seeing hints of tree trunks and grass along the forest floor. You've got a very well established foreground, but the background feels kinda nebulous to me. I wonder what's between that kid and the trees. Another way to solve that might be to bring the trees down to show more sky, since you've got a low view. That might eliminate the need to establish a middle-ground.
Your rendering of the child is super and I think your flame is great.
Wow Carmen! If it couldn't be more rich, you go ahead and make it richer. I adore the changes and it definitely got more depth. What a BEAUTIFUL piece! :D
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